Tag Archives: Brian Wilson

Beach Boys

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Wow…I made one New Year’s resolution, which was not to make fun of dead people. I’ve been doing that lately.  Not real dead people, but iconic ones. People get all dippy when a famous person dies and before you know it another Facebook saint is canonized. Even people who absolutely despised them in life find wonderful things to say about them post-mortem. Drives me nuts. If you hated somebody while they breathed, why love them once they’ve stopped?  Anyway, to get back to my story, I saw some weirdness by Beach Boys fans on Facebook this morning. Now I like the Beach Boys well enough….like some of their stuff, but I hate some of their stuff too because it’s truly awful, which by definition makes me not a Beach Boys fan, who like everything they ever did, even Student Demonstration Time, and who see nothing unusual about spending your adult life in a sandbox also utilized by the cat. I see a piano in a litterbox and I think something’s wrong. Not so the Beach Boys fan. In fact the only thing that gets them riled up is a picture of Mike Love. It certainly did this morning. He was pouring champagne and wishing them all a Happy New Year. Bad mistake. They hated him. Really hated the guy. I had no idea anybody could hate Mike Love or hate anything Beach Boy. Hate seems like such a strong word for such a mild topic. And when one of the angry fans called him the original Abominable Snowman I was completely bewildered. Abominable Snowman?  A Beach Boy? One was from the Himalayas, the other Hawthorne. One is covered with hair and the other wears a bald guy hat. How does that make sense? But it all made sense to the Beach Boys fans. Some kind of in-concept, that I was not in enough to understand. It was weird and cult-like and creepy. A harmless kind of creepy, maybe, but still creepy. So, of course, I had to go and write a nasty comment, all about how strange and disturbing Beach Boy fans are. It was uncalled for, I admit. But irresistible. I’m weak, I gave in, got very literary and sarcastic. And now perhaps a few Beach Boy fans are listening to Pet Sounds and feeling self-conscious as they get all moon eyed humming God Only Knows. Maybe I dampened the innocence of staring at the album cover and thinking wouldn’t it be nice if they were feeding one of the goats too with Brian and Dennis and Carl and Al and Mike Love (who isn’t  actually feeding the goats, which is why goats as well as Beach Boys fans hate him). Subtextually, of course, I was actually making fun of the iconic Brian Wilson…if you make fun of Beach Boys fans you are making fun of the Beach Boys and by default making fun of Brian Wilson. Who isn’t dead, I know, but might as well be. Which is how New Year’s resolutions go right out the window.

Dennis feeds an invisible goat while waiting for the drugs to wear off.

Dennis feeds an invisible goat while waiting for the drugs to wear off.

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Brian Wilson

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There’s the time that Alice Cooper and Iggy Pop were invited over to Brian Wilson’s house to work on some music. True story…this was in the 80’s. They felt like they’d been summoned by royalty. They get there and Brian is in his bathrobe at the piano in the middle of the sandbox, catshit everywhere. Brian is playing Shortnin’ Bread, singing how Mama’s little baby loves shortnin’, shortnin’, Mama’s little baby loves shortnin’ bread. He waves to Alice and Iggy to join in.  Mama’s little baby loves shortnin’, shortnin’, they all sang, Mama’s little baby loves shortnin’ bread. Then again. And again. After a while they asked if he wanted to work on any other tunes but all he wanted to do was sing Shortnin’ Bread. Mama’s little baby loves shortnin’, shortnin’, Mama’s little baby loves shortnin’ bread. He showed them how it was played on the piano, and why it was the greatest song ever and how it was the only song he wanted to play ever.  An endless hour went by, Brian singing Shortnin’ Bread over and over and Alice and Iggy feeling more and more uncomfortable. Finally Alice excused himself and made his escape taking Iggy with him. Neither talked about it for a long time. I don’t know if Iggy ever has. Think of it…Brian completely weirded out Alice Cooper and Iggy Pop. Scared them, even.  Mama’s little baby loves shortnin’, shortnin’, Mama’s little baby loves shortnin’ bread.

Cantiones sacrae

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‘In your status line, list 10 albums that have stayed with you in some way. Don’t take more than a few minutes and don’t think too hard – they don’t have to be the “right” or “great” works, just the ones that have touched you. Tag 10 friends, including me, so I’ll be able to see your list!’

So i wrote Best of Foreigner, Best of Styx, Best of Foreigner and Styx, Journey: a tribute to Foreigner and Styx, Boston: the Guitar Solos, Best of Toto, Best of Kansas, Best of Toto When Not in Kansas Anymore, A Lot of Shitty Bob Dylan Songs No One Talks About, and Brian Wilson’s Trout Mask Sandbox.

“Right” or “Great”. That is the written equivalent of the kind of guy who says they don’t have to be the “right” or “great” works and makes little finger quotes when he says right or great. Personally, I hate quotation marks. I almost never use them. It really bothers me when I have to use them. There is no such thing as quotation marks in spoken language, hence our meme author here and his finger quotes. Or “finger quotes”. Finger “quotes”. I hate quotation marks. Continue reading →